Monday, April 26, 2010
After a long and trying journey, I'm here to say that a new chapter is beginning in my life. I'm still unsure about what the future holds for me, but I'm not afraid to take charge anymore. Having both made mistakes in this marriage, my husband and I have decided to call it quits.
I'm continuing to learn from all of this. I've learned that I'm a lot stronger than I've given myself credit for at times and that life is too precious to sit by and watch the world without being a part of it. Adversity may come up and bite us in the behind from time to time, but how we handle that adversity speaks to our character.
When we first met, we truly thought that we had found our soulmates. We had our bumps in the road, but they were speed bumps and not potholes. We worked together to face and resolve problems. I don't know where we lost that, but we did. Maybe the place in the road where we lost that was too far back to try and find it again. I don't know.
As many of you have read, we hit extremely rough times of late. Between work, home, and life in general, the will to fight for our marriage diminished. Compound mistakes on both sides, and the odds of finding what we once had were microscopic. The only thing that hasn't diminished is our love for our kids. THEY are the reason we've decided to focus everything on them and their well-being. They've got all the support from both of us that they'll ever need.
In a few weeks, I'll be moving to my own place close by. I'm purchasing a home for me and the kids, and their lives will only be disrupted a bit. They'll attend the same schools and have the opportunity to visit with dad every evening if they so choose. Friends from school will be their neighbors, and the opportunity for them to gain social skills is there. Once again, God has blessed me.
Things may have not worked out for me and the husband, but I hope he finds happiness. I wish him no ill will regardless of the past mistakes we've made. The kids think the world of him, and I'll not tarnish that image. Truthfully, we've been more civil since coming to this decision than we have in a long time. We've vowed to move forward with our lives, and I have much hope and anticipation to see where this new road leads.
To anyone out there who may be in the same position as I was when this journey started: There is hope (and not the stupid BHO kind) for happiness and peace. Stay strong, stay focused, and ALWAYS be true to yourself. You're much too special to settle for anything less. You deserve all the happiness the world has to offer. Don't think that you don't. And always keep the faith. It moves mountains and blazes new paths for us to follow.
I just hope the world is ready for a B & G fan with a taste for life.