Iran to Crack Down on Suntanned Women

Ah, yes. The glow of a suntan to add a little color to one's body. It's what many believe can add a healthy appearance to many when done in moderation. But not if you live in Tehran. Iranian women are being warned to stay out of the sun or face jail for violating the islamic dress code.

According to the NY Daily News, Iranian officials are threatening to arrest women (and men) who sport proof of their time in the sun citing that it violates the very dear islamic dress code that those cavemen love so much.

Tehran's police chief, Brig Hossien Sajedinia, made the following statement:

"The public expects us to act firmly and swiftly if we see any social misbehavior by women, and men, who defy our Islamic values," he said, the Telegraph reported. "In some areas of north Tehran we can see many suntanned women and young girls who look like walking mannequins."

"We are not going to tolerate this situation and will first warn those found in this manner and then arrest and imprison them."

Many women in Iran have come to embrace their beauty and become quite the stylistas, choosing freedom over the oppressive rules set forth by those living in caves. Iranian law dictates that women must wear headscarves and burqas to hide their shape, but many women, especially in Tehran, thumb their noses at the law and barely follow it (You go, girls!).

One of Iran's leading clerics, Ayatollah Kazim Sadighi, explained that when women dress inappropriately (define that, please), men become excited, and the result is earthquakes. That right. We now know what caused the devastation in Haiti. It wasn't a shift in tectonic plates, it was all those women partaking of life in the sun.

Other than the obvious oppression of the rights of these women as human beings, where is the end of this slippery slope? Sure, they say that it's only going to be those who sunbathe, but what about women who have to walk miles in the sun to the market? Will they one day be accused of violating the law? Or what of the women who help on the family farms and work in the sun all day? Do they face potential jail time?

The women of the resistance movement in Iran need our continued prayers for strength to fight against their oppressors and for their basic rights as human beings. Their battle against the Cro-Magnon mentality of Iran's leadership is going to be a long one.

I suggest we arm them in their fight by sending crates of Coppertone.